Hands That Create
by Miss Meggie
Summary: Little toy trains shift Jemma's view of Grant. *Roman Ward Verse* for WS Sommer prompt fashion.


Since the stone had released Jemma she'd felt off balance. Like the very density of her bones had changed, like there was something sinister and hollowing living beneath her skin, like a ghost sliding its dark force between her vertebrae, behind her eyes, tickling at the tips of her fingers as if it wishes to regain control over her.

Rather than let the thing have control and give in to the violent and bloody visions she has of murdering Skye in vivid detail she decides to run. It's almost as if Fitz reads her mind once he sees the leather luggage set she'd gotten as a wedding gift being pulled from storage.

He'd simply handed her a set of keys "He's in Texas with Roman in a little town called Poteet."

"Fitz…" She murmured worryingly clamping her bottom lip between her teeth.

"Hey I'll be down to see you. Distance should weaken its power." He reassured her.

"No it's not that, is Roman safe with me? Is Grant safe? He did awful things but…he's still the man I love in some ways."

"Think of them, what do you feel?"

A slow smile graces her face. "Roman makes me feel peace."

"And Ward?"

She rolls her eyes because Fitz knows this answer. "Curiosity as always."

"Then they should be just fine."

-/-/-

That was three months ago. They'd had a very loud blow out about some of his choices like the one where he chose to harm people she cared for. There was no blood shed which she had most definitely feared but apparently the pieces of her that were rock had taken a shine to Grant the same as she had so many years ago.

That is the one thing that is crystal clear to Jemma. Despite all of their twisted faults and hidden darkness she loves Grant the same as he does her.

They start slow, she sleeps in the spare room and Friday's are always family days. Wednesday is date night. They go to the movies a few towns over and get lost in fictional worlds where it isn't so complicated.

It takes Roman awhile to acclimatize to her presence. He'll let her cuddle him sporadically and he'll ask her things. "Where did you go Momma? Did it hurt? What did you do while on your trip? "

He mostly relies on Grant for all of the things she'd loved doing, Bath time, reading, cooking for him. making him giggle and putting him to bed.

It hurts quite a bit if she's honest.

It's Sunday and she's picking up around the house as Grant lies in the floor with Roman trying to teach him to play tic-tac-toe. "Your circles are executed nicely but your strategic planning skills lack conviction." She hears Grant say.

Roman gives a long suffering sigh as if to say the fact that a game is never just a game to his father is nothing new. "Whatever Dad." He says placating him.

"Did Skye teach you whatever in her last FaceTime?" He asked in a dry tone.

"Uncle Leo says when you're too serialous say whatever." He answers with imperious pride only a Ward can pull off.

"That was nice of him and you mean serious."

Jemma quits eavesdropping and returns to her task.

She picks up Roman's stuffed frog Sir Hops-A- Lot and places his him on the bed.

Next chunky plastic Legos and toy soldiers are returned to their bin. She props his toy guitar in a corner before going to straighten up Roman's wooden toy train set. She picks up the engine piece. (It had been a part of a horrendous snarled up looking crash scene.)

It is handmade she can tell by the sanded smooth feel and intricate design of _" R.D.W. Locomotives"_ carved on to the side. The design featuring Roman's initials is bright gold leafing against the rich red of the body of the engine car with its glossy black wheels that spin smoothly when she sets them in motion with her finger tip.

She flips it over to see if she can find the craftsman's mark to see if she can commission more toys from them.

On the bottom carved delicately is _"To Roman on his second birthday, you have refashioned my existence into an actual life of worth and meaning. Dad"_

For some reason the little toy in her hands shows her just how much Grant has irrevocably changed. Hands that once ended lives are now the same hands that create priceless things for her son to enjoy. It makes her chest feel tight as though her heart knows just exactly where it's headed.

The urge to cry with the realization is sudden and strong.

She wonders into the living room where their game has ended and Roman sits on Grant's lower back drawing on the skin of his shoulders with a Crayola crayon washable marker.

"Have you met my tattoo artist? He's giving me what's supposed to be a dragon but it feels like some lines and dots." Grant directs up at her.

"It looks an awfully lot like Jackson Pollack vomited on your back..." She said looking down at Roman's work.

Grant shrugged. "It'll come off. Maybe Mommy needs a turn."

"Hearts for Momma!" Roman decrees excitedly.

"That sounds lovely Romy." She folds herself to sit before Grant "Did you make this?"

She sat the train piece in front of him.

He eyes it and then gives her a soft little smirk constructed to steal her breath and warm her heart, it works well. "There's more to me than meets the eye Jem." He said softly.

"I know that…I just this surprised me."

He's rough on his toys and when I first took over caring for him he loved to sleep with his toys for self-comforting purposes, I'd read somewhere leaving toys in the crib could lead to suffocation ." At the word suffocation he shudders a moment before continuing and her heart twinges with sadness for him. "So, I made him some toys. A frog to replace Hops at least temporarily, a car, an ICER and finally the train because he loves getting caught by it and watching it go by on the way home." He explains.

She smiles and he must see something on her face because he sighs softly. "Jem, the man who loved you then is not the man who loves you now. I know what I stand to lose if I become him again. Turns out I like being honest about who I am. Who I am now? What you see is exactly what you get I'm a man who doesn't mind hard work, who loves the hell out of his kid and really wants the love of his wife and to be deserving of it."

"I'm different now." She voiced her deepest fear. (What if the darkness coiled asleep within her arises and makes her a monster not even Grant can love?)

"And that's okay, it doesn't scare me. I know you love me and I know you love Rome with every fiber of your being. You keep waiting for it all to click into place and it will if you just trust that nothing has the power to take this from you. Not that rock and not SHIELD."

"How did you-"Again he speaks to the fear she dare not give a voice to.

"You're my wife I know how your mind works. That click you're waiting for is happening you just can't see it because you want it so bad. We'll go slowly but we'll get there one way or another." He turns to Roman. "Hang on." He pushes up on to his hands and crawls to Jemma in a perfect plank position, Roman giggles gleefully at the motion.

When Grant kisses her softly, there is a beat of pure silence but for the erratic beat of her heart, until it's accompanied by a tiny voice. "Yucky Dad."

He huffs a laugh against Jemma's face. "You won't always think so Chub."

Jemma regretfully breaks away from him to look over his head at Roman. "Tell me the latest fashion in heart shaped body art.

"Ummm….." That mischievous glint in his pretty gray eyes should frighten Jemma. (She's likely to end up with Kree Blue hearts on her forehead.) Instead she's just too happy to give a damn and lets Roman do his best work.

I own nothing but Roman. I hope you liked it.


End file.
